Wife Life

 

When people ask “What do you do?” I always tell them I’m a (stay at home) mom, which I most certainly am. But I’m more than that, I’m a friend, a supervisor, a cook, a maid. I’m a wife.

I try to be supportive. My husband plays guitar (and several other instruments). Our house looks somewhat like a music store, complete with two drum sets and a plethora of guitars and amps. I love that he is musical, but it’s not always convenient to have an impromptu concert in the living room. I try to give him time and space to do his thing.

I try to be attentive. With two kids, it’s easy to let my husband and his needs slip to the side so I make an effort to make him a priority. Listening is so important. Do we have different interests? Yes. But that doesn’t mean I can’t listen to him talk about power tubes and pick ups. He listens to me talk about all things kitchen, laundry, and kids.

I try to always have dinner on the table when he gets home. He works so hard to take care of us and for me to be able to stay home with the kids, so I try to feed him when he’s hungry. He doesn’t ask for it, but I know he appreciates it. He likes to eat quickly so he has more time to spend with the kids.

I try to have all the housework done by the time the kids are in bed. We don’t have a lot of alone time together. Between my husband’s work schedule and our location (far, far away from family and friends), we never have a babysitter so we have learned to make the most of our nights and early mornings. If the house is messy or I have a list of things to do, I’m not being fair to either of us. Making time to spend together is essential.

We love our kids and they always come first, but it’s still so important to make each other a priority. I sneak notes into his lunchbox, I make his favorite cookies, I pack his lunch in the morning, I compliment him. I look for things I can do to help him, things I can do for him to show him I care. A late night back rub, mowing the lawn so he doesn’t have to. Simple things can mean a lot.

He spoils me (and the kids) so I try to be good to him. I say “try” because I’m not perfect, I slip up a lot. The important thing is that he knows I make an effort and that I love and appreciate him. When you want something to last a lifetime, you take care of it.

Are you married or in a relationship? What are your tips for success?

Have a great day! Xo

 

 

A Tale of Two Babies

My daughter is 8, my son is 17 months. She was born in November, he in February. The only similarities between them are that they are our children, they have my chin, and they were/are picky eaters as babies.

I’ve always known they were different from each other, even my pregnancies were night and day. **I’m a huge supporter of breastfeeding and cosleeping both, but I hold nothing against formula feeding or babies in their own beds.** My son has slept with me his whole life, like an extension of me, but he has never slept through the night. “This,” I said, “is why I cosleep. I can’t imagine getting up with him twice a night and still functioning during the day.” I coslept with my daughter too, though she slept through the night when she was a week old. It never dawned on me that maybe he needed his own space, maybe I was waking him up, maybe he didn’t need to night nurse, maybe he would be okay without me.

My husband brought up sleep training. Maybe we should try it,” he said. “He needs to learn how to sleep, he’s old enough to sleep through the night.” Logic I could not argue with. So over the weekend we put the crib back together (it had been used as a cosleeper, attached to the bed) and moved it out of our room.

I don’t think anyone in the house slept the first night, but everything I read said to give it a week. I committed to a week. By some miracle, he slept the whole night both the second and third nights. I don’t remember the last time I felt this rested! I wake up once or twice because I’m still adjusting, I miss my little snuggle buddy. I’m sure I’ll get used to it, but it’s a hard blow because he is my last baby. He is very close to self-weaning and he is getting increasingly independent. He is my last breastfeeder, my last cosleeper. My arms ache for him, but at the same time I’m enjoying my newfound mobility and freedom.

I can’t believe it took me 17 months to realize how different my babies really are! I cherish their differences and their individuality and I love them both more than life itself. I’m also learning to appreciate bedtime and letting them go by themselves. It’s nice to read in bed again. I like to have coffee in bed while my husband gets ready for work. I like the quiet, the calm before the storm. I’m glad I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried sleep training. I don’t think it’s for everyone, but it definitely fits for us right now. I’m a big believer in doing what’s right for you and your family.

My advice is to do whatever feels right to you and never let anyone judge you. Your life, your family, and your marriage are your own. If you have love, you have enough.

I’m sorry if this seemed scattered and rambling, I hadn’t planned on posting but I couldn’t contain my excitement!

Questions and comments are always welcome! Did you breastfeed or bottle feed, cosleep or sleep train?

Have a great day!

 

Hmmm….

A lot has happened in the last two months. I really thought I would be better at this, but I let life get in the way. At first it was computer issues, then my son had to have surgery, then we remodeled our kitchen. It feels like I’m running in circles and low on time. I joined a great group on Facebook called Fill the Cookie Jar, I love it and everything everyone posts, but I’ve yet to post anything myself because the timing is always off for me. Doctor appointments, dental visits, back to school shopping and haircuts, play dates, and daily chores that I can’t seem to keep up with. The last couple months have shown me that I don’t have nearly as much control as I thought I did…but I’m okay with it. The constant ebb and flow of family life is exciting and comforting. If I don’t blog or bake or post, I still get hugs and kisses and pictures to hang on the fridge. We just started sleep training, and we are getting ready for back to school and our annual end of summer vacation so I will probably continue to be inconsistent online for another month or so. I should get back in the swing of things once school starts back up, unless I’m overwhelmed with classes of my own. My husband and my kids are taken care of, that’s what matters most.
Any questions and/or comments are welcomed!
Xo

Hello!

Oh my gosh, my first blog! I’ve thought and thought and thought for days about what to write and then I realized, I should just introduce myself and give you a feel for what I’m all about and what I’ll be writing about down the road.

I’m Nikki. 27 year old mother of two, Kylee (8) and Logan (1.5). Wife to Jeron.

My family is my life, I’m a stay at home mom with a plan to eventually go back to school for a degree. I’m very blessed to be able to stay home, my husband is a wonderful man/father who is very devoted to his family. Making it on one income wasn’t always in our plan.

I don’t identify with any specific parenting style, but I lean towards attachment. I’m an advocate for breastfeeding and I’m very much anti crying it out. I believe babies and big kids need lots of hugs, cuddles, and reassurance. I don’t want to grow old and wish I had held my kids more. I want them to know I’m here for them whenever they need me, no matter what.

I live in the kitchen, but I’m no chef. I love cooking and baking and feeding my family delicious, homemade food. I’m teaching my kids to cook NOW because I know far too many adults who can’t cook and it baffles me.

We live in the upper peninsula of the great state of Michigan, 4 hours away from our closest relative. We don’t get a lot of visitors so it’s brought us closer together as a family. It’s also shown us who our true friends are, which was a hard pill to swallow. Time and distance are definite game changers.

We live in a fairly rural area so I’ve gotten pretty fantastic at online shopping. I’m a lover of sales, outlet malls, and even yard sales.

Books! With my youngest still needing lots of attention, I haven’t read much lately. I hope to get back to it very soon though and I plan on sharing!

I plan to “blog” (that’s such a weird word for me to use still??) about parenting, marriage, cooking (maybe I’ll even share some recipes?), friendship, mom stuff, woman stuff, and probably a bunch of random things. I promise not to blog about politics or religion. While I have my own opinions and my own faith, I never want to seem as though I’m forcing anything on anyone. I also promise to be less scatterbrained in future posts. 🙂

That’s a little about me, please feel free to ask questions! I’d love it if you would introduce yourself in the comments!